There’s A Reason

I can’t imagine what that reason is though. As I write tonight, I am mourning my brother’s death. He was tragically killed at his job! Sounds like a horror movie plot. No one ever imagines it can happen to you, until it does.

I loved my little brother. We all had our differences, and of course we spent 48 years together as brother and sister growing up so we’ve had our share of fights, arguments, joys, pains, holidays, births, deaths, weddings, celebrations, birthdays, everything. I just can’t help but feel angry tonight. I know I will go through the stages of grief, and sometimes I feel like I don’t have that right. I can’t imagine what his wife and children are going through. But I shouldn’t be too hard on myself, he was my brother and we did a lot together. I feel my older sister bossiness (is that a word?) coming out wanting to scream at him, wait! get out of the way dammit! He was killed at work by a malfunctioning machine. He prided himself on being a master at that stupid machine. I am mad he was in the way of that stupid machine. If I was there I would have told him to move. I would have never been at his job, so it sounds a bit far fetched.

So, we will all just go on like robots and do what we are supposed to do and go on. But now it just feels different. I will find encouragement in my class Monday morning, my kids will help me move on.

8 thoughts on “There’s A Reason”

  1. I simply have no words… just sadness for you and your family…God Bless you all…

  2. I completely understand that you are angry. I’m angry too for several reasons at myself at her and the driver that it them. Not to mention at T’s sperm donor. Maybe we can get thru our grieve together. Praying for all of us.

    1. Thanks Vickie, and I know you know what I mean when I say FORD! (Her Midwest accent, she was actually telling me FORWARD when we were visiting her after the Joplin tornado)

  3. I can’t begin to imagine the depths of the grief that you and your entire family are feeling and how hard this is. My Dad was saddened to here of this tragic loss, said he remembers Brian as a ‘sweet boy’ and asked to pass on his condolences.

  4. Joyce my heart is breaking for you. You were so gracious in your help for the family just a few short weeks ago and now you hahave be to feel the same grief. Please know that we will all be here for you in the best way we possibly can. I also have been through a tragic death of both of my brothers so I know the pain and the process of it all. You will always be our family.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you always. ♡♡♡♡♡

    1. thank you so much Tammy… just like my brother, we try to help any way we can, I just saw an opportunity

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