Month: September 2017

What a week! Such a roller coaster really… so many things going on at once. People say, just settle down and slow down the pace. I seriously have a hard time doing that, unless I am sick, or just don’t feel right. I lost someone who was near and dear to me, and gained a whole new person in my life! Actually, two new people came into my life, for good. And boy is one full of energy, a cute little two-year old. I always thought I was ready for a baby later in my life, as a grandparent or something. But I have come to realize, young energy is a whole new concept these days! As I look back at when my Ashley was young, as a toddler I can’t even compare to my step daughter’s boyfriend’s little girl. She is just non stop energy. I don’t know where she gets her fuel from. It must be from the leaded pump. I don’t remember children being so high-octane, are they all like that these days? I found myself needing a nap after just one day! Of course, she had no intention of slowing down… let alone for a nap!

Well, each person is different and it is in life that we meet all those differences. Life is how we deal with all these different personalities I guess. Our choices come when we decide who we prefer to spend our time with, the high-octane? or the mellow yellow crowd? It also depends on what phase of life we are in too…

Anyway, I lost a wonderful spirit this week to a drunk driver. I call her my niece but she really isn’t because I am divorced from that part of my daughter’s family, technically. I haven’t talked to my ex-husband in a very long time but I talk to his family at least everyday, why is that? It’s only on Facebook, but I feel close to them. I have history with them, and they are all women so my husband shouldn’t feel left out, just a circle of friends who live twelve hundred miles away. I have always felt close to Nicole, but she deserves her own post, so maybe I’ll do that tomorrow or Monday.

Those words mean well, but, to me, right now, and my ex sister-in-law turned good friend, I don’t think they even touch us. I can’t even imagine the loss she is feeling right now. Her beautiful, wonderful, sweetheart of a daughter was killed by a drunk driver last night. The horrible accident could have been prevented by a phone call to a taxi company, a caring friend who might have taken the driver’s keys, an Uber app, a Lyft app, or even a sleep before he went behind the wheel. Such a loss of life. So close to home, I just can’t stop thinking about her. I loved my niece dearly, I wanted to see her provide a great life for her daughter. I had it rough being a single mom too and I always tried to be encouraging to her in whatever way I could. I remember sending her and her daughter a box of arts and crafts stuff that I didn’t need anymore, just so they could spend some quality time together, without having to go to the store or look up things to do. I hope they got to share that time together. I want to take the hurt away from my good friend Vicki, I want to make things better for her daughter Tianna, but I’m afraid there is nothing I can do. Except pray for them to be touched by Nicole’s life. I feel the extreme loss and sadness for them. It hurts, but doesn’t even compare to what they are feeling right now. Hold on tight. Our days are numbered. Love now, love hard. Make time count. Use the good china on a Monday night hot dog dinner. Use the silver. Make tents and forts on the living room floor, (I imagine Nicole doing this with Tianna, she was a fun girl!) She always called me her crazy Aunt Joyce, I hope she had time to be crazy with Tianna. I love you Nicole and the world is a darker place because you aren’t in it anymore.

If you feel prompted and wish to make a donation to help Vickie pay for her final resting place, please contribute, even if it’s a small donation, every little bit helps. Click on the link. Thank you, and hold your loved ones more.

I am hoping this link works… I can’t get the link to go live, copy and paste might be needed…

https://www.gofundme.com/ykr5p-devastating-death-of-young-mother

Do you deal with stubborness on a daily basis? Do you know someone who is just SO stubborn? Eek! It drives me crazy! I am stubborn and I am sure I must drive someone crazy, because I deal with it daily. Maybe that is why I can spot it from a mile away.

Some of my students are stubborn. They just won’t do what I ask of them. I wonder why? Do they just don’t want to copy their homework? How can I convince them that they NEED to copy it? How can I convince my daughter that she SHOULD spend time with me? How do I get my wonderful husband to close what he opens? Maybe it’s just my curse, my burden, maybe because I am stubborn! I can’t think of a certain instance where I can compare myself to these situations, funny, huh? I bet my husband is thinking right now as he reads this… WHAT? I can think of a million things! She leaves her shoes all over! I just don’t want to pick up my shoes, I like them there in front of my chair, that’s where I’ll find them tomorrow for work!

There must be an answer and that is what I find myself doing tonight, looking for an answer to the question, how do I get my students motivated to do the right thing without me telling them over and over again. I find myself searching the web for cool, interesting, engaging STEM activities that I know they will want to do! But, I stop in my tracks, what if it doesn’t excite them like it excites me? That’s a chance I will just have to take. Maybe my excitement will be contagious, one of my favorite principals I’ve ever had, always used to tell me that I was contagious, my laughter, my smile, my motivation. I took it as a compliment, sounds like it was right? I am going to turn my irritating stubborness into a motivational inspirational drive to convince those scholars tomorrow that being stubborn is a good thing because it gets those things done! At least I am aware of stubborness, I can either fight it or let it be and use it to my advantage… I gotta go pick up my shoes.

I always thought that was dumb, “a good tired,” until I became a teacher. I don’t want to sit here and complain because I did just have an entire summer off, but it’s hard to get back into the swing of things! Alarm set for 5:30 am (still not enough time to check Facebook), traffic, just the stress of driving in before I’m considered late is hard! I only work 15 miles away from my school but it takes a good hour (there’s that word “good” again) to drive there! That’s crazy time! That’s 4 minutes for one mile! At least I don’t live in LA right? I listen to music, drink coffee, and eat my breakfast snack to pass the time, and hope that I get there in time.

Today is an emotional day for me. It was my birthday and the anniversary of my dad’s death, five years ago. If you know me and/or read my post entitled “Oil and Water Really Don’t Mix” you know of my relationship with my dad. He loved me, but didn’t know how to show me, and I really didn’t hold it against him, I still loved him, he still taught me well. But it was tough. My birthday present to him every year was leaving his home in North Carolina, what he wished for. And, in the end, he ended up leaving us on my birthday. Ironic. So, which leaves me in a predicament. Do I celebrate my birthday? Do I remain solemn all day to remember my Dad? I don’t know what to feel. I’m just tired, a good tired! Today was also the first day of school with the kids!

First days… what can I say? I have the same group of kids I had last year, no, I don’t have to teach them again, I just brought them through second grade, now we will go through third grade together, it’s called “looping” in the education world. It was really like we never left each other. Same kids doing the same things they did last year. A positive thought is that I was right on top of it. I just hope they still love reading! Again, I am a good tired. I did a lot today, felt a lot, thought a lot, walked a lot, drove a lot. It is a good tired, I guess. I guess a bad tired would be still tired but didn’t do anything all day! At least my life was full today. I thank everyone that took the time out of their busy day to wish me a happy birthday, I really do appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you for a good tired. May tomorrow bring us all another good tired.

Today I was reminded of long ago, when my teaching career had just started. We have quite a bit of new teachers at our school, and they are young! As they are bright eyed and bushy tailed, the thing I adore most is how they don’t stress over anything. They are just casual, it’ll get done. They don’t let deadlines effect them for some reason, maybe they have it already done, with all that energy, I bet they have! Not like this “seasoned” teacher as I am often called.

I know the new teachers don’t like to be called “cute” but they are! I can’t help it! Not that they have cute little lunch boxes or anything, just little details like their screen saver to their computers showing our school mascot and the school logo. I am still trying to get those official lesson plans in the google drive! They are off installing new software and wondering when we get teacher’s manuals. As with experience comes wisdom. Of course, I already have copies made to start my children off on something the minute they enter the room, while I work out the new attendance system on the laptop. Not that it is busy work, and I do have some new, exciting activities for them, they just have to have practice in putting it down on paper, in word form. I can’t wait until Tuesday when they try to Save Fred!

I remember twenty years ago when I was all fresh. Back then, we didn’t even have a curriculum printed! Just a long list of concepts and skills our set of children were to know and master by June. I remember tracing, cutting, laminating (in which I still adore!) double checking I had everything I needed for the next day. I hand made folder activities, worksheets, writing paper, everything I had planned on paper. I had so much energy! I’d be up well past midnight until it finally dawned on me I should be going to bed. Maybe that’s why I suffer from insomnia!

The new teachers actually give me a quick charge. Maybe it’s the thought of when my energy level was through the roof. I want to wish all my teacher friends a wonderful year, even though I will miss some of them desperately, Jen!!!!! As I miss many other friends I still keep in touch with at my old school. Have a great year, and hopefully I can master some of that new found energy for this “seasoned” teacher.